In this world, there are so many sad events, crimes, hate, and poverty, but we also need to remember all of the good.

The little things in life, freedom, and, the greatest of all, love. Do you show love to your community?

This week for our interview, I’m privileged to introduce Beth Brooker, the state leader of Get Equal Virginia and Hampton Roads Pride Board Member.

AltDaily: What do your friends and loved ones call you?

Beth: Nothing too exciting here, just Beth!

What is your involvement and/or position with the LGBT community of Hampton Roads?

I was elected to the Board of Directors of Hampton Roads Pride in January. It has been great working with some very talented people to get Out in the Park ready for Norfolk. The event is going to be something you’ve never experienced! I am also the State Lead for GetEqual VA. GetEqual is a national organization whose mission is to empower the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) community and our allies to take bold action to demand full legal and social equality, and to hold accountable those who stand in the way. One of the things GetEqual VA is working on is building a coalition across the state of people who want equality and are willing to fight for it. If that is you, please contact me at GetEqualVA@gmail.com. Together we can make a difference. (Sorry, shameless plug!) I love being involved and getting to know the community.

Beth "Equality" Brooker (Pic | Facebook.com)

Who has been the most inspirational figure in your life, and why?

Well, this is a hard question. There have been many to look up to; Harvey Milk, John F. Kennedy, Gloria Steinem, but I think I would have to say Martin Luther King, Jr. This brave man led a revolution in a time when no one thought it possible. His work to end racial segregation and racial discrimination through civil disobedience is a model still used by organizations today.

If you could have lunch with one person in Hampton Roads, who would you choose, why, and where?

I would have to say my dear friend Dawn Wilkinson; I haven’t seen her in awhile and I miss her. Dawn is a great person with a big heart. We would have to dine at Route Deli 58 in Virginia Beach. I mean, have you seen the size of the sandwiches there!?

What is your proudest accomplishment?

I would have to say coming out. I lived for 40 years in the closet. In my mind, I had built up coming out to be the end of life as I knew it. What would people think or say about me? Would I lose friends? My family would disown me…and on and on. But when I actually told family and friends, they actually told me they loved me regardless and supported me. Both my brother and sister told me they knew! (I don’t know why I thought they didn’t!) My mother is a work in progress, but she is a 73 year old, southern Baptist woman (enough said!). She loves me regardless, though.

What is the thing you love the most about Hampton Roads?

When I first moved here, I didn’t like Virginia. I am from North Carolina and, just like the song, I love calling North Carolina home. But in the last year, I have gotten to know more people and actually like it here a lot better. So I guess I would have to say the people! We are an interesting mix. (I do like The Naro, though. Nothing like going to an old theater to see a movie!)

What is the thing you hate most about Hampton Roads?

The frickin’ traffic. Holy cow! Could we have some light rail already! I also hate that it is very hard to find the “activists” in Hampton Roads. There are LGBT rights that need to be fought for. No one is going to just had you marriage rights or end discrimination in the workplace. You have to get mad about inequality and then stand up and do something about it. It you want equal rights, please let me hear from you!

What advice would you give 16- year- old you?

Come out, come out where ever you are! Do not be afraid to be who you were born to be. Nothing is worth living a life of shame and lies. Nothing.

The Braveness Test…What’s the most embarrassing thing the general public could know about you?

Wow, I don’t know. I don’t think it has happened yet…maybe it will today!

Where is the place to be in the next seven days?

I sing in a quartet with Sweet Adelines International (4-part a cappella barbershop harmony) and we are getting ready for our Regional Competition in Winston-Salem, NC April 8-9. We have a singing coach coming in from San Francisco for the weekend, so I will be in my house with five other women singing until I’m hoarse!

And now Beth would like to share her “coming out” story…

Getequal Va (Pic | getequal.org)

I knew I was gay at an early age. I was the tom-boy, and I was always hanging out with the boys playing flag football in the streets of my neighborhood. I started playing softball at age 8 and retired at age 32 when I could not get out of bed on Monday mornings after playing traveling ball all weekend. Guys just never interested me in “that” way.

For most of life, I lived in secret. Never letting anyone (outside of my circle) know I was a lesbian. Fearing I would be fired if I ever told anybody at work, I didn’t say a word.  I worked for municipal and county government for sixteen years–enough said! It was hard when everyone was talking about their weekend with the family, and I just sat there and didn’t say anything. If I was asked, I would tell some of the things I did that weekend, but I always changed the story just enough so they wouldn’t ask me about family or if I had a boyfriend.

When I turned 40, everything changed. I decided that I didn’t give a shit about what people thought about me. I was going to live my life with no apologies. If someone didn’t like my lifestyle, that was their problem not mine. I could not control their reaction and I shouldn’t try. I had a desire to right the wrongs and fight for my rights. In the past, I just wasn’t educated on the issues and really just wanted to live my life and not worry about whether I could legally marry or save money on health insurance because I could be on my partner’s insurance, or what would happen to benefits or property if my partner died, and on and on.

Seven years ago, I told my sister and brother and they were fine with it. They both told me they had a feeling and wondered why I didn’t tell them sooner. I started telling close straight friends. They all supported me and told me they loved me regardless of my sexual orientation. Life was good.

I got a job working with a non-profit eight years ago and was outed by my supervisor. It was unintentional, but shocking for me nonetheless! No one cared! It has been a great relief being able to be who I am in the workplace. In fact, there are four lesbians on staff out of twenty-six employees!

It then became time for me to tell my mother. My mom is 73 and has lived in the South most of her life. She is also a southern Baptist and goes to church every time the door is open. I love my mom. When I told her, her response was, “Oh Beth, you will not get to see your father and sister in heaven. Homosexuality is a sin and you are going to hell.” Well, that was four years ago, and we have had many calm and not-so-calm conversations about my sexuality. She is coming around and I know she loves me. It is a work in progress.

Now I volunteer for two local LGBT organizations and I am out and proud in my community. I fight with equal rights and I have a great, loving partner who supports me.

It is much easier to live life when you have no secrets to keep. We put so much pressure on ourselves about coming out. Acceptability is important and there is that safety factor. Bigotry is alive and well! I will say that everyone owes it to themselves to be open and honest about who they are. We think it is safe for us to live in the closet and that just isn’t true. If you have friends that won’t accept you for who you are, they aren’t your friends and it is better to know that early. Advancing the LGBT movement requires we all come out and let people see us living our everyday lives. We are not better or worse for who we love, we are all the same – normal, everyday people.

Now for this week’s events…

Joanna Lynne at the Jewish Mother (Pic | Russ Helgren)

FRIDAY MAR 25TH

The Hershee Bar proudly presents for the first time, JoAnna Lynne, from 9pm to 12am. JoAnna’s voice is like a little piece of heaven right here on earth that is sure to make you smile. The 2002 graduate of Princess Anne High School and Berklee College of Music recently released her new cd, “Two for Me.”

SATURDAY MAR 26TH

Hot girl band Mermaids in the Basement is back once again for your listening pleasure. Their host will be Five Points Farm Market from 5:30 to 6:30pm.

TUESDAY MAR 29TH

ODU Out will hold their general meeting from 12:30pm to 1:30pm in the Isle of Wight room of the Webb Center.

FRIDAY APRIL 1ST

It’s the funniest day of the year and the Hershee Bar is inviting you to come laugh with them and support the Hampton Roads Pride all at the same time. The reigning King of Pride Josh Logan will host “April Fools Drag” from 10pm to 12am. Come out and support him in raising money for our community’s Out in the Park.

SATURDAY APR 2ND

Neil Mulligan will host a wine tasting at his historical home in Ghent to benefit Out in the Park from 7pm to 10pm. Space is limited, so you want to get your tickets A.S.A.P. Tickets purchased before March 26th are $55 and after that date will be $65. There will be a live pianist and hors d’oeurves to enjoy in a beautiful setting with friends. Go here to RSVP and get more details.

Wine tasting benefit

Hampton Roads Pride still needs volunteers for fundraising events and Out in the Park. If you would like to volunteer please contact me at 2dmiller6@gmail.com. If you would like to help but can’t fit volunteer work into your schedule you can make donation by contacting any of the Board of Directors  or mailing checks or money orders to Hampton Roads Pride P.O. Box 1064 Chesapeake, Va 23327 or using our paypal.

Would you like to be a vendor at Out in the Park? Our vendor applications are now available here. We also invite you to be a community partner (sponsor with or without vendors space) our community partnership applications are available here.

A group of firefighters who call themselves The Misfits have come together to spread the word that our friend Sara Jones needs our help. As many of you know, she is a big inspiration in our community and is battling her third fight with breast cancer, which has metastasized to her bones.  The former firefighter has been one of our strongest. The Misfits are asking you to start a blizzard of dollars by sending one dollar to Sara Jones P.O. Box 270183 West Allis, WI 53227. This money will go to help pay for the $60,ooo in medical bill that insurance will not cover. Team Jonesy appreciates your support.

ONGOING WEELY EVENTS

The Rainbow Cactus Co. Wednesdays 18+ (other days 21+). Latin dance lessons 8pm to 10pm; DJ Arrick 10pm to 2am. Thursdays karaoke with KJ Jimmy and pool tourament at 8pm. Fridays two DJs drag racing contest and drag performance at 1045pm. Sundays 18 and up dinner specials, college ID gets you in for free, Wet-n-Wild contest and drag show 1045pm. (Open Monday 6:30pm-11pm W-Sun 7pm-2am)

Sarah’s Irish Pub-Tuesdays are LGBT night, 6pm to 9pm.

Lavender Light Dinner in Williamsburg on Tuesdays- dinner at a different venue every week from 6:30pm to approximately 8:30pm. Contact Terri at baileygurle@yahoo.com

UNO’s Chicago Grill-Pride night on Wednesdays.

TRANSition Your Life Clinic-1pm to 4pm, free and confidential HIV testing, health screenings, and prescriptions for hormone therapy. ID and Social Security Card required for appointment. Call 757-640-0929 to schedule an appointment.

Klub Ambush-Mondays, hanging out with the guys. Tuesdays, Sandra Lopez and show cast. Wednesdays, The Noami Black Show. Thursdays, male dancers and different weekly host. Fridays, dance party host DJ Red Man and Naomi Black. Saturdays, different Diva Saturday. Sundays, SIN Sunday specializing in service industry night. (Open Mon-Sun 5pm-2am, all shows start at midnight.)

The Wave-Tuesdays, Goth night with DJ Danny. Wednesdays, Studio Wave disco. Thursdays, throwback Thursdays with DJ Danny and Drew B. Fridays, Indie/New Age/Alternative/club step night with DJs Danny and Drew B. Saturdays, House night with DJs Stan, Jeff Lube and Danny. (Open Tues & Thurs 10pm-2am, Fri 5pm-2am, Sat 10pm-3am)

The Garage-Mondays, steamed shrimp 5 for $1, or oysters 3 for $1. Tuesdays, 50 cent tacos and karaoke. Wednesdays, Drag Spectacular with Porsche Stevens-Ross and male dancers. Thursdays, Supper Specials for $7. Fridays, $5 crab cake plate or $6 shrimp plate and men’s night out with DJ Glen. Saturdays, party with Disc Jockey DJ. Sundays Karaoke and Tea dance at 4pm, male dancers at 830pm and drag show with male dancers at 11pm. (Open 8pm-2am M-F and Sun 10am-2am)

The Hershee Bar/HeBar-Mondays, pool league. Tuesdays, $5 steak dinner and karaoke with Jimmy. Wednesdays, shrimp night and Wednesday Happy Hour. Thursdays, pool tournament, social pool league. Fridays, show night with DJ John to follow. Saturdays, DJ Dana rocks the house. Sundays, karaoke with KJ Jimmy. (Open 7 days 4pm-2am)

The Corner Pocket-Mondays, Spaghetti and Salad Night with karaoke at 9pm. Tuesdays, drag shows. Wednesdays, happy hour 5pm-9pm with DJ and bartender SONIC premiering movie night. Thursdays, dinner specials of 15 cent shrimp and 10 cent hush puppies, happy hour 5pm-9pm, and karaoke at 9pm. Fridays and Saturdays, drag shows. Sundays, karaoke with Kay. (Open 5pm-2am 7 days)

Smackwater Jack’s- Wednesdays, that fun loving lesbian Linsey Hutton from Tootsie’s karaoke will be your KJ for the night beginning at 8:30pm-1:30pm.

Scooter’s Sports Bar-Thursdays, every Thursday night come out to enjoy drink specials and a live performance by that hot lesbian duo, Undercurrent. Show starts at 9pm.

The Voodoo Lounge-Thursdays, Thirsty Thursday drag show at 11pm, cover charge begins at 10pm, must be 18 or older, and midnight dance party to Hip Hop and dance hits. Fridays, dance party with happy hour from 7pm to 9pm, dinner special from 6pm to 8pm, and appetizer special from 9pm to 10pm. Saturdays, speed date at 8pm and dance party at 10pm. Sundays, male review 11:30pm and a live DJ all night. 21+ only on Sundays. (Open Wed-Sun 9pm-2:30am)

Mahatma Gandhi said, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” How simply profound of a statement is that? Are you being the change you want in this world? If everyone sat around waiting for others to speak up then nothing would change. I challenage you to stand up and get involved for a better world. The beloved actress, Elizabeth Taylor, RIP, passed away March 23, 2011. She was one of these people that stood up by being strongly involved with the AIDS cause. Take example from her and people like Beth Brooker and so many others.

I was reminded of that today when a lesbian friend who lives in Nigeria told me via email how her partner is seven months pregnant with their first child, and that they are saving to move to Cyprus. In Nigeria, if they are “found out,” especially because of the child, they will be stoned to death. So stand up for equality and be proud. We are lucky to be in a country that allows us to do that.